Break out the 'Jump to Conclusions' Mat

If there's one thing that's fun to do during spring training, it's taking incredibly small sample sizes from games with dubious competitive value, and trying to draw conclusions from them. So instead of analyzing the hell out of them, I've got a better idea. You see, it's a mat you can put on the floor... and it has different CONCLUSIONS on it that you can JUMP TO! (Note: while we always have a wonderful Office Space theme going at WHYGAVS, it's only fair of me to note that the incomparable MJD ran a similar column once or twice at FanHouse).

Anyways, we're one game into spring training and the good news is that there's already some conclusions to jump to. Today we've got:

1. Brian Bullington got rocked today, giving up five hits, five runs (four earned), and a homer with two walks an no K's in one inning today. He's done. Cut his ass.
   
2. Tom Gorzelanny missed his start, which means he's certainly badly injured and will probably need serious surgery this year.
   

So who's jumping?

I suppose since I already started with an incredibly low opinion of Bullington, I'm not ready to jump on him yet. I think that both he and Van Benschoten are at the end of their careers as starters, but I'd personally toss them in the pen for part of a year and see how they handle that. Due to all of the surgeries both of them have undergone, it's possible their problem centers around them simply not having the arm strength to start anymore. It's also possible that they suck, but there's no harm in finding out (in AAA, that is).

As for Gorzelanny, you know I'm on the "this dude's getting injured" train and I've been on it since probably last June. I just stated the facts in a FanHouse post and we've gone over them here before but once more for the record: Gorzo had arm trouble in the minors, he threw around 40 more innings last year than he did in 2006, and he consistently racked up big pitch counts last year throughout the entire season. Clearly, predicting injuries is not an exact science and I won't pretend to know more than what I just typed out, but if I had to pick a Pirate starter to miss a significant amount of time in 2008, I'd pick Gorzelanny.