Pirates 6 Brewers 1

There's pretty much only one story from tonight's game... Ian Snell was out of his mind tonight. Remember Ian Snell= L insane L. I don't know what to do with those L's, they kind of throw a wrench into things. Snell matched Ben Sheets and one upped him in just about every way possible in Sheets' big return to Milwaukee's rotation with a 7 inning, four hit, 1 run, 9 K line, with the only run he allowed being a Prince Fielder home run. On the offensive side of things, the only run the Pirates mustered off of Sheets in his six innings was an opposite field Jeromy Burnitz home run, after which pigs flew and the temperature in Ogden Nutting's den dropped precipitously. Luckily for the Pirates, Sheets was done after seven and was followed by Dave Bush, who proceeded to give up five runs in the top of the eighth, capped off by a second Burnitz homer. I would hope that somewhere a GM would be thinking, "Man, he's really started to hit the ball. We could use his veteran-osity and his nose-to-the-grindstone-acity," but unfortunately Dave Littlefield can only be employed by one team at a time.

There was also lots of WHYGAVS commentor favorite Trenni Kusnierek on the telecast tonight, as she's a Milwaukee native and apparently has done some embarassing things at Miller Park over the years before staring at FSP, like filming an interview with the bright camera light shining on the field during an inning and taking part in, but not winning, the famed Sausage Race. There was also talk of something even worse than those two cataclysmic events, but either the guys in the booth never figured out what it was or I somehow missed it.

Meanwhile, Milwaukee fans failed to notice the game as they were enraptured by the thought of a new Sausage in the big race. You laugh (mostly because I used the words "new sausage" and "big race" in the same sentence, I'm sure), but imagine what would happen in Pittsburgh if they ever introduced a "Melinda Meat" pierogie, then multiply it by a million, that's what the frenzy in Milwaukee must be like with the introduction of the Chorzio.

I'm proud of myself for avoiding the obvious Randall Simon joke. I also think that a "Carl Cabbage" pierogie might be a funnier name, but I'm not entirely sure.