Monday, May 01, 2006

Your daily dose of propaganda

Today Ed Eagle writes for The Mouth about how we shouldn't expect Craig Wilson to, you know, improve or anything this year and how he's probably headed back to the bench when Casey comes back. It won't be long before his weekly mailbags are replaced with a recorded gretting that will sound something like this:

Good evening, Pittsburgh. It's nine o'clock and this is the Voice of Fate. It is the first of the fifth, two-thousand and six. The fans of the Pirates are advised that Freddy Sanchez is having success only because of the way he is being used as a part time player and not because he is actually talented. It is suggested that getting one's hopes up to see increased playing time be avoided. Productivity reports indicate that the tinkering with pitcher's mechanics may end the rationing of start length by month's end. In a speech today Dave Littlefield, Party Minister for Team Improvement, indicated that the Pirates' roster prospects are brighter than at any time since the end of the 5 year war plan. Craig Wilson's hot streak will last until May 7th at 9:02 PM when a slump will commence, lasting until 7:13 PM on June 11th. This is the Voice of Fate signing off. Have a pleasant evening.
Pittsburgh Prevails.