Pirate > Snake

Near as I can tell, Victor Santos has not turned into Tom Gorzellany for tonight's late 9:40 start. The D'Backs kill Santos according to the ESPN bottom line, which we all know is never ever wrong. The Snakes are trotting out some guy named Claudio Vargas. Charlie calls him Arizona's version of Ryan Vogelsong. Incidentally, Ryan Vogelsong has the lowest WHIP in our bullpen, which is nice for Ryan, but terrifying for everyone else. The lineups for this one are out early, McLouth is still in center which would indicate that Bautista isn't back yet. Doumit is at first because Craig Wilson is Charles Manson reincarnated, or something like that, in the eyes of Dave Littlefield and co. Or he would be if Manson were dead. I probably won't watch much of this one. I'll be watching the season finale of House. Or maybe at a bar. Or both, perhaps.